Liuzhou Laowai

Random thoughts on life in Liuzhou, Guangxi, China

Archive for September, 2017

Blue Sky; Bluer Water

Today in my perambulations around the city, I saw something rarely seen in Liuzhou. Yes, astonishingly, that is blue sky behind the Bubugao Tower. I had been in Liuzhou several years before I saw blue sky. In the early 2000s the government moved most of the factories out of the city centre and closed down […]

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Brexit Cushion

As if Brexit wasn’t confusing enough (thanks largely to the Maybot and her staggeringly incompetent government), my local supermarket is adding to the chaos. I’ve always found Chinese students very geographically challenged. God knows what they are taught in school. I once gave some university students a blank outline map of China and asked them […]

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Hucking Fell!

Twenty years ago, I was living in west Hunan province. A very nice place. On day, shortly after I arrived, one young man asked me in English. “How to you like Fulan?” I hadn’t a clue what he was talking about and mumbled some pathetic response. Later, I discovered that what he had asked was […]

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Give Me Your Chefs

“Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me: I lift my lamp beside the golden door.” …and your chefs. A mere ten years after it was first proposed, Liuzhou has this month arranged for a local […]

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Friday Food 183 – Lentils

Friday food is a weekly article about one of the more unusual food items to be found in Liuzhou that week. This week, we are lovin’ some lentils. You are probably thinking there is nothing ‘unusual’ about lentils, but there is round here. A few days ago, I came across the red ones being sold […]

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Civilised Survey

I was sitting in my downtown Liuzhou home last night, pondering on the nature of nothingness, when there was a knock on my door. I opened it to find two women clutching reams of paper. They tried to look round me to see if there was anyone else in the room – like perhaps a […]

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Cheesed Off!

Some brain-dead official cretin in China’s customs bureau has decided to ban the import all European soft cheeses on the grounds that they contain “too much bacteria”. A bit like Mozart’s music having “too many notes”. I want to get hold of the jumped-up ignoramus and point out to him that his body probably contains […]

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